Hey friend! Did I ever tell you about how I started doing that thing where you pick a word for the year? Well, I started in 2018 and holy crap I couldn't even imagine the impact it would have.
I think God actually led me to do that because that year was going to be so hard that I needed those reminders that He was really leading me through it. And I'm not sure I would have been able to do what I did without those words.
So in December 2017 I heard about how some people do this thing where they pick a word for the year and focus on that and use it to help guide their goals. It sounded good so I decided to ask God which word I should pick for myself. But in fact, He had two words for me actually and the first one was fierce. Then he showed me another word which was supposed to back up the first word, and it was fulfilled.
If you have read that post that I wrote about how God led me to change churches, you can see how fierce I had to be. You can (click here) to read it. Back then, I was a person who would avoid conflict at all costs but God decided it was time for me to grow a backbone and boy did I. As I made this radical change in my life, most of the people around me didn't understand it and tried to convince me to go back to my old life.
I had one lady from my old church come to my house and straight out tell me that if my husband didn't approve, then I shouldn't be deciding which church I wanted to go to. Basically, listen to your controlling husband and get back in line little lady. Now, she was super nice about how she said it and she is a super nice lady, but essentially that was what it boiled down to. Let your husband control you. Let him decide because if he doesn't agree with what I'm doing, I shouldn't be doing it.
So did I learn how to be fierce in 2018, uh yeah! I went from being a scared, timid little person to a woman who knows what she wants and isn't afraid to go for it. But what about fulfilled?
You know what happened about that? I had forgotten how much I love worshiping God in a loud church. I had become this old person who thought Hillsong songs were possibly unchristian and even though I was desperately trying to bring new music into my old church, I had forgotten how easy it should be to just go to church and worship with my hands in the air and jumping around because it's fun.
Yes, church can be fun. I know. Crazy.
So when I start going to my new church and re-discovering this passion in my heart for just singing at the top of my lungs. . . well you know what? I felt so fulfilled, like I'd never been in my entire life. And being fulfilled sustained me through that season where I had to be fierce because it became the reason why I was pushing through so much conflict. I was able to be fierce against the people pulling me down because being fulfilled was too awesome and wonderful to let anyone take it away from me.
I think there are two kinds of conflict in life. The kind where someone wants to hold you back from something and you have to pull away from them. And the kind where they get in front of you and try to directly oppose and stop you. I faced both and I can tell you with 100 per cent confidence that if God is leading you somewhere, nobody can stop you from going there.
The pulling kind is where someone tries to convince you not to do something and the opposing kind is where they actively try to stop you by getting in your way. Facing both of these kinds of conflict built up my strength greatly and those words, fierce and fulfilled were like water to my soul in that time.
So when December 2018 came around I thought well hey, let's do it again! So I asked God again and He told me to pick righteous first and then secondary to that, humble. And now it's May 2019 and how is this working out for me? Huge so far and I'm really excited to see how much more I'll grow in these words this year.
The dictionary says that righteous means:
1. (of a person or conduct) morally right or justifiable; virtuous.
And the dictionary also says that in the old english it means:
rihtwīs, from riht ‘right’ + wīs ‘manner, state, condition’.
So God wants me to be a person of right morals, justified and virtuous (sounds good to me!) and he also wants me to be in a right condition. If you are a knowledgeable Christian, you'll see some deep meaning here already. Like remembering to forgive all of those hurts from last year so that I don't have even one shred of unforgiveness in my heart because God says in His word that if we don't forgive others, we can't be forgiven and I do not want that! To be in right standing with God means having his forgiveness and I can't have that if I hang onto those wounds from 2018.
Plus I'm also writing this blog now and if God is going to use my writing to impact people's lives, I need to be writing with a clean heart. I cannot use this platform to spew out hatred and negativity or lead people astray. I have to stand in righteousness so I can lead rightly.
So what about humble? The dictionary says:
1. having or showing a modest or low estimate of one's own importance.
This secondary word has been so key for me. Do you know what it takes to admit you were wrong? Humility. So when I have mistakes that I need to ask forgiveness for, I'm going to need that humility. And God is also showing me that I need to get to know the leadership in my new church because he's led me to them for many purposes, one of which is that they will be my godly leadership and I need to stay in humble submission to the authority God has given them in my life.
I know that God wants me to do big things for Him this year but He also doesn't want the success going to my head. That leads from humility to pride, which leads to falling - usually flat on your face. I don't want that. It's not fun.
There are times when I've been called to be fierce and it led me into such fulfillment but now God is calling me to be righteous and humble. So if you read anything on my blog this year and you think I'm forgetting about my calling this year, call me out on it friend.
Comments